I always seem to complain bout not getting things done--which is my life these days.  But the rest of last week was focused on a couple of key things--the most important being my friends coming over for dinner, gift exchange, and gingerbread house building.  I kept planning to clean my house all week and of course I waited until the last minute.  I always cut it close, but...  I get ahead of myself.

On Thursday I had a long talk with the instructor of the resume writing class I am taking.  She gave me a hard time, but she also knew what I was going through and was trying to help.  I appreciate that she was working so hard to help me.  I, of course, had tunnel vision and could only see the need to clean my house.  I tried to work on the stuff she wanted me to, but I fell short of meeting the objective.

Friday was more trying to clean, and I did make some headway.  I stayed in bed too long and then had my psychologist appointment.  I told him I thought something was against me, but he kept pointing out how well I was dealing with the adversity in my life--namely backing into the garage door.  He made some comment about the passage in the Bible regarding cutting off your hand if it offends you.  I think he said it was in Mark somewhere.  I tried looking it up to get more context, but I couldn't find.  I probably could if I searched on the internet.

Friday night was a party at the club.  I managed to clean a little in between, but it wasn't very much.  There was next to no one at the club.  All the other people who help behind the bar were all gone.  I did the bar by myself and there was only one person helping pick up the cups afterward.  They all had good reasons--birthday, Jim Brickman concert somewhere out of town, bladder surgery, preparing for a party the next night.  The club wasn't that full in general and when I closed the bar to dance, it wasn't really a problem--and I had plenty of room on the floor for a quickstep.

Saturday was the big Christmas party that some friends hold every year.  I started out the day grocery shopping and then frantically cleaning the house.  I got a lot done, but there was still a lot to do.  In the middle of this I was also making the gingerbread and baking the first half.  My house smelled great.  I finally had to quit to get ready for the party.  I was trying to show up closer to on-time--I ended getting there about 45 minutes after it started.

When I got to the party, I was surprised how many people were already there--I normally come late as I thought all people did.  There were several people I knew would be even later due to other commitments.  The party was good and I got to see a good friend I hadn't seen since the spring.  She has darkened her hair and it looked great.  When she went blond it kind of washed out her face a little, but the new color makes her face glow.  Plus I think she has lost a little weight--I probably should have asked.  Women always like to be asked if they have lost weight.  I keep thinking I should ask her out, but that is way far away from where I am emotionally.  I just don't have the guts to do it.  Plus, why would she go out with me--I'm short, fat and bald.  Well, not as fat as I was, but I am still overweight.  Anyhow, when I wanted to leave around 11:00 PM, I revealed that I was teaching Sunday School to explain why I needed to go.  The friends who were there were surprised--everyone kept asking me how long have I being doing that.  I think they were hurt that I hadn't said anything before, but they know that I don't talk religion around them.  Anyhow, the party was good and the food was great.  It was snowing when I finally left around 11:30--I was pleased with how the Prius handled in the blowing wind and snow.  It was super cold so the snow was very dry and was blowing around causing visibility issues.

Sunday morning I got up early to put together a lesson plan.  I managed to throw something together and headed off a little late.  Class went well--I handed out kisses as the kids participated by reading or answering questions.  I even got a few gifts from the students.  We were missing almost half the class, which I am assuming was because of the snow and cold.  I contemplated skipping church to finish cleaning and get ready for my friends to arrive, but I went.  After church I came home and cleaned furiously and baked the second half of the gingerbread house.  I was wrapping presents when my friends arrived.  I had not finished vacuuming and the kitchen was a mess.  My friends said only good things and I went about cooking dinner.  Normally, we wait until after we eat to do the house, but we are always rushed so I suggested we do it before.

I tried a new icing recipe--a buttercream.  I chose this mostly because I already had the ingredients and the royal icing we had used in the past was too runny.  Well, this time the icing was too thick and the kids kept breaking the bags.  Icing was everywhere.  They got through the decorating while I continued making dinner--ham, macaroni and cheese, mixed vegetables, and crescent rolls.  I had apple sauce as well, but forgot about it.  When we were eating I kept thinking something was missing.  After dinner we opened gifts and I was kind of teary eyed for some reason during the gift part.  I still don't know why.  My friend's aunt came with them and she brought me a little gift--I had something for her, but did not expect anything at all.  The kids really liked the scarves--the boys wrapped them around their heads to become ninjas.  Everyone was appreciative of the gifts which made me feel good.  They got me the game Smallworld and a gift card to Lowe's.  I am not a do-it-yourselfer and they said that part of the stipulation was that I needed to let them know what they needed help with so they could come and help.  I had a hard time keeping it together.


I made more icing to assemble the house and made it thinner--unfortunately too thin.  It was very runny and the house wouldn't stay together.  It is still partially erected on my table.  I need to decide what to do to get it finished so I can take it there this weekend when I go up to make pierogies.  I go up most years and help with them.  They are basically my surrogate family since my family is so far away--plus I feel like I am distancing myself from my family even though I have seen them an awful lot this year as compared to years past. 

I think the problem is that I feel so guilty when I am at my parents' even though I don't getting anything more done when I am at home.  I still need to decide if I am going back for Christmas--I have pretty much decided I will, it is just a matter of when and for how long.  It would upset my sister a lot if I don't go home, plus I am supposed to buy her present for another sister and I haven't done it yet which means I haven't mailed it yet.  I am not sure how much more time I have to mail stuff.  I feel like such a grinch since I am not buying hardly any gifts this year.  I need to get my parents something, but I have no idea what.

I need to get to bed.  Let's see if I can get a sleep pattern going where I actually sleep.